CCAR RESPONSA
Contemporary American Reform Responsa
193. Some Questions on Wedding
Procedures
QUESTION: Must the ketubah be signed prior to the
ceremony? May the bride and groom see each other prior to the wedding in order to perform the
ceremony of bedecken? Is there any objection to guests rising as the bride enters in the
processional? Is this a Jewish custom? (Rabbi B. Lefkowitz, Taunton, MA)ANSWER:
The ketubah must be written before the wedding ceremony (Ket. 82b; Shulhan
Arukh Even Haezer 61.1; P. Dykan, Dinei Nisuin V’gerushin, pp. 134 ff). It must be
signed by two witnesses who will be present for the ceremony. Normally the witnesses also sign
it immediately prior to the ceremony. But as far as I know, there would be no objection to their
signing it following the ceremony, after they have actually witnessed it. As the ketubah
deals with the obligations which the groom and bride assume upon marriage, they must sign it
beforehand, but need not see each other at that time. Now let us deal with the custom
of bedecken. This minhag was already mentioned in the Mishnah (Ket. 2.1)
and also found in later books of minhagim (Liqutei Mahari 3.130; Minhagei
Yisrael, p. 360; Shulhan Arukh Even Haezer 31.2; Isserles, etc. ) This custom is
optional and need not be undertaken even in an Orthodox ceremony. If done, it would take place
just before proceeding to the huppah. As that time the groom places a veil over the
bride’s face. This is usually done in the families’ presence. As this act forms an immediate
prelude to the ceremony under the huppah, it could be designated as the beginning of the
ceremony. The bride and groom would see each other at that moment and then proceed to the
huppah. It should be noted that there is nothing in Jewish custom or law which prohibits
the bride from seeing the groom on the wedding day as long as they are
chaperoned. As far as the assembled individuals rising when the bride enters, I have
not heard of this custom, nor is it mentioned in any books of minhagim available to me.
There is no harm in doing it, but why bother?April 1982
If needed, please consult Abbreviations used in CCAR Responsa.