CCAR RESPONSA
New American Reform Responsa
24. Non-Jewish Parent and Hagbahah
QUESTION: Is it appropriate for a non-Jewish father of a Bar/Bat Mitzvah to physically hold the Torah for the hagbahah while the Bar/Bat Mitzvah reads the verse vezot hatorah…? (Rabbi Jonathan Stein, Indianapolis IN)ANSWER: The participation of a non-Jewish parent in the Bar/Bat Mitzvah of his/her Jewish child, as well as participation in the other religious festivities of the weekend, have been discussed a number of times although this particular question has not arisen before. Our answer is based on two principles (W. Jacob Contemporary American Reform Responsa # 160) . The essential elements of the service must be conducted by Jews. Non-Jews readily understand this and so there is rarely a problem with the non-Jewish partner. Equally important, we wish to encourage strong family relationships and have the non-Jew feel at home and at ease during life cycle services. Furthermore, we want the child to understand that the non-Jewish parent can be included in some measure in the joyful festivities of his/her life. The ceremony of hagbahah is part of the Torah service and is therefore considered a special honor. It is, however, not one of the traditional aliyot which are regularly part of our Saturday morning service, and so we need not be too careful about who receives this honor (Contemporary American Reform Responsa, #149). Frequently in smaller traditional synagogues this task is given to a boy not yet Bar Mitzvah or boys who are attending services, but would normally not be honored by aliyot, etc. This represents an effort to involve a larger number of individuals in the service itself. We could therefore involve the non-Jewish parent in this part of the service especially as that individual need not say anything. We must balance these considerations with marit ayin as this is a highly symbolic boundary issue. How will the congregation perceive this individual’s participation? Will it blur distinctions which need to be clear? We have no problems about a non-Jew coming in contact with the Torah. Christians, of course, are to be considered monotheist and have been regarded in this fashion for a thousand years (W. Jacob (ed) American Reform Responsa #151). We regularly teach Christians Torah and have them see and touch the ritual objects of our synagogue in order to understand Judaism better. Of course, participation in the synagogue service is different and should be limited (Contemporary American Reform Responsa #160). It is possible to involve a non-Jewish parent in the ceremony of hagbahah during her/his child’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah, but it may in conformity with congregational policy be denied.February 1989
If needed, please consult Abbreviations used in CCAR Responsa.