Gentile Bridesmaids

Is a Gentile eligible, according to Jewish law, to be one of the wedding party—a bridesmaid, groomsman, et cetera? (From Rabbi Bernard Kligfeld, Long Beach, New York)

The law requires that certain people connected with the wedding ceremony be witnesses. For example, there must be two witnesses for the validation of the signatures on the Ketubah. There must be two witnesses to the giving of the ring, that is, the actual marriage witnesses. The seven blessings must not be recited except in the presence of the ten grown men, that is, Israelites. The witnesses certainly must conform to the Jewish law of witnesses, and it is clear that, in general, women and minors and non-Jews cannot be witnesses. (See Mishna, Baba Kamma I,3; Mishna, Rosh Hashonah I, 8.) There is, of course, an exception to the rule that women and Gentiles, et cetera, cannot be witnesses: when, for example, one witness is acceptable to free a woman from the bonds of being an Agunah, then, specifically, one Gentile witness is sufficient if he speaks “innocently” about the husband’s death. Therefore, if we are to regard the groomsmen and the bridesmaids as witnesses, the bridesmaids, being women, are ineligible whether they are Jewish or Gentile, and the groomsmen are ineligible if they are non-Jews,

However, it is clear that the groomsmen and bridesmaids are not to be considered as the legally necessary witnesses, especially if there are the adequate number of Jewish witnesses without them, as there usually are in these elaborate weddings. Then certainly there seems to be no objection to their presence.

As a matter of fact, the bridesmaids, groomsmen, et cetera, are to be considered not as witnesses but as the companions of the bride and groom, respectively, namely, “shoshvinin.” Thus, in the Talmud (Ketuboth 12a): “In Judah they used to appoint for the couple two shoshvinin, one for him and one for her in order to guard the bride and groom.” The shoshvin is described as merely a friend. Thus, whenever it is discussed who is not eligible to testify, the law includes his friend; that is, his shoshvin may not testify (see Mishna, Sanhedrin III, 5). Thus the shoshvin, or groomsman, is defined as a close friend. If, therefore, his or her close friends are Gentiles and there are adequate numbers of required witnesses without them, there seems to be no real objection to their being part of the pageantry of the wedding festivities. In addition, it was the widespread custom to have Gentile musicians at wedding celebrations (see Reform Jewish Practice, II, 70).